31 Days (Day 12) Limited in my ability to carry life. PART 2

Mother's Day 2009 was to be the day that we would share with our families that we were pregnant. When I woke up that morning I did not want to get out of bed and go to church. I did not want to smile and pretend that everything was okay. There was nothing in me that wanted to share this story with anyone. I do remember that day being asked for the first time since our loss..."do you have any children"? I remember feeling paralyzed and guilty as I answered NO to avoid at all cost the truth of our journey with a stranger. 

Matt, in usual Matt fashion, made the day better. He deemed it BEST WIFE IN THE WORLD DAY! He said that it would only be celebrated in our house that day. We had a great lunch a Panera (one of my favorites). He gave me a card that morning that means so much to me I leave it out all of the time on my dresser.

Saturday, May 8, 2009, the day before mother's day this was my journal entry.....

Matt and I have a robin’s nest in one of our bushes outside. Today, while cleaning up our yard, I came across a nest of baby robins. They must have just hatched. They had no feathers and were so tiny. The only way that we knew they were alive was by their tiny chests moving up and down. We now check them daily to make sure that they are growing. We feel as though we have become most attached to them....however the ever present momma robin....reminds us that they are her babies and not ours. We still enjoy peaking in on them everyday!!

May 14, 2009

I think that you can say we are officially OBSESSED with the baby robins. Matt called me today at work to let me know that he captured the shot above. He had been standing in side of the garage (with door shut) and was able to peek through the garage windows to watch the momma feed her babies. Today their eyes are open. They have tons of feathers. And their little mouths are ALWAYS open. I know their momma must be tired!!!!!

God so beautifully reminded me trough the LIFE of these baby robins that HE CARES about each Mother's Heart. For He is the ONE who has given each mother a heart to love their children. These baby robins became a HOPE for me. A HOPE that God was still in the LIFE business and each time I looked at these baby robins I became more and more confident in that He would give LIFE to Matt and me again. 

With so much time spent outside late April early May, I was encouraged by a few people to plant something in memory of our first baby. While at Home Depot one day I selected 2 Gardenia Bushes. The Gardenia smells a lot like the Hawaiian flower, Plumeria. I decided to purchase 2 Gardenias simply for the fact that I did not want one bush to be planted alone. They are planted next to the gate opening of our fence, a perfect balance of sun, water and shade.

I remember the day I planted them longing for our first baby that we would never hold on earth, but joyfully anticipating the day when we will place our next baby beside those Gardenia bushes, take a snapshot, and thank God for how far HE has brought us. 


October 12, 2012

God truly has been limitless in giving LIFE to Matt and me.  For some reason, the Lord required us to give our "first fruit" to Him.  But, in return He blessed us with two children 14 months apart.  Here they are this past summer under the gardenia bushes.

I titled this blog The Teal Egg because God proved to me HIS LIMITLESS POWER through life in a a tiny teal egg.  Every time I see a teal egg, I am reminded of what God brought me through personally and how gracious and gentle He has been with me in proving Himself over and over again to me.



If you or someone you know have suffered the loss of a child, I HIGHLY recommend

I Will Carry You by Angie Smith.

God Enough by Kasey Lowery Ewing